INFO for Families

Glee Deals with "The First Time"

Glee is a wildly popular and very entertaining show, effectively targeted at teens and young adults. For those of you who have been living on Mars for the past few years, it follows the lives of the students and teachers affiliated with the glee club at large high school. Riding the momentum of the "High School Musical" wave, the choir is made up of a diverse group of students, all united in their love of music. It is not uncommon for them to bust out in song to elaborately choreographed numbers at least three or four times an episode.

In addition to the natural likability of the show's format, Glee has tackled some pretty heavy topics over it's two and a half seasons.

Tuesday night's airing of Glee had two couples, one gay and one straight, losing their virginity. The episode was aptly titled "The First Time." Given the popularity of Glee with teenagers, it is likely that your kids either watched it, will watch it on online later, or will talk with others who watched it. Wise parents will make sure they are ready to talk about it.

The Parent's Television Council called the episode "reprehensible." PTC President Tim Winter said, "Research proves that television is a teen sexual super peer that can, and likely will, influence a teen’s decision to become sexually active. Fox knows the show inherently attracts kids; celebrating teen sex constitutes gross recklessness."

Contrast that with the viewpoint of the show's creators.

Chris Colfer, who plays a gay character describes it this way: "I think it's handled very sweetly and very emotionally," he said. "They're expecting this big, raunchy, suggestive, brainwashing storyline when really it's very sweet."

Colfer's perspective is exactly what concerns me. Presentations like this further tells our kids that as long as it is "sweet" and you are "in love" then it's all okay. And our kids are being fed an endless supply of this drivel. Without somebody to tell them differently, it is the perspective that, over time, they will develop as their own. 

I spent most of this past weekend working on a book project designed to remind parents that it is their job to train and equip their kids to guard their future sexuality. The very health and strength of their future marriages depend on it. Seeing the content of this new Glee episode serves to remind me of what we are up against.

If you google "Glee First Time," you will get 50 million hits. Most on the first few pages are reviews of last night's episode. The best I can tell, all of them are glowingly positive. The world loves this stuff. So do our kids. Pray for opportunities to discuss these issues with the ones that live at your house. If your kids are fans of the show, you might try watching this episode with them. 

Whatever you do, don't demonize it. It's too entertaining to be "bad" in their mind, so if you do that, your kids might think you're completely irrelevant and you will have lost your influence.

Stay clued in, parents!!

*For the curious out there who didn't get a chance to see the episode, there is a pretty detailed synopsis at Billboard.com.

Everyone But the Center...

You need to watch this clip.

It is awesome on many levels: It is funny...it features Texas football...and it illustrates something quite relevant to families today.

 

"False start. On everyone BUT the center." Brilliant.

Do you ever feel like the center? While everybody else is doing the wrong thing, you stand alone, wondering if it would be much easier just to go along with the crowd.

It actually sounds tempting.

I'm a Sucker for a Sappy Movie

Fox has brought back "Family Movie Night" to Saturday evenings.

Their first offering is called "Change of Plans." It deals with the powerful theme of international adoption and illustrates that there are some kids in our world who simply need a home. It might be good viewing for your family this weekend. 

    

Here's what Dennis Rainey of FamilyLife had to say about the movie...

If you're anything like me, you sometimes have a hard time finding quality entertainment that you can watch with your family. That's why I am so excited to tell you about a new movie airing on Fox this Saturday night (8 PM, 7 Central), as part of Walmart and P&G's Family Movie Night series.

Change of Plans tells the story of a young couple, Sally and Jason, whose lives are turned upside down when Sally's best friend from college is killed in a tragic accident. Sally and Jason are forced to make some life-altering decisions when they discover that she has been named legal guardian to her friend's four children, three of whom were adopted from third world countries. Change of Plans stars Brooke White (American Idol) and Phylicia Rashad (The Cosby Show) and according to the official website, portrays how "fulfilling life can be when you look beyond your own plans and invest in the lives of others." What a great discussion starter for you to engage your kids around issues that are truly important.

Jon Gosselin to Write a Parenting Book?

Let the late night monologue jokes begin.

A report has surfaced that Jon Gosselin, of "Jon and Kate Plus Eight" fame, is in the beginning stages of writing a book about parenting. I desperately want to be gracious here, but I'm trying to guess how much of this is driven by "strike while the iron is hot" economic motives and how much is driven by a sincere desire to help other parents.

While he's still not sure of what his "hook" will be, a source close to Gosselin says this: “Jon is still deciding what exactly the book will be about, but knows he wants to focus on his parenting skills.” I honestly cannot wait to read what he has to say. Perhaps he has learned some unique lessons about parenting through his unique circumstances. Perhaps.

But in my experience, there is one element of parenthood I have learned is critical: consistency.

When they were young, my kids needed consistency in rules and discipline. This helped them feel safe and secure.

As they have grown into teenagers, my kids have needed consistency between what I say and what I do. Nothing has illustrated this more than teaching a few kids to drive. I cannot roll through stop signs and yet expect them to stop completely when they are behind the wheel. When my children are watching my life, the need to "practice what I preach" becomes paramount.

Any message about character development or the need to be committed to Christ will fail to penetrate the hearts of our kids if our lives do not have the integrity to back it up. That is, perhaps, the lesson that our friend Jon may need to learn before he writes his book. He may be an attentive dad when he's around them, but the older his kids get, the more they will pick up on the apparent inconsistencies in his personal life.

So how are you doing in the consistency department? Are you making behavioral or moral demands of your kids that you are not modeling in your life? What needs to change to keep the integrity of your parental leadership intact?

Top 10 Lists for Media This Week

The folks over at the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding occasionally release their top ten lists of all things media. As a parent, it's always interesting for me to see what is popular in movies, music, music videos, etc. In many cases, I don't have a clue who have the artists are. But it can make for interesting discussions with the kids.

Anyway, here's their most recent release.

CPYU Top Tens as of May 16, 2010

More on Teens and Technology

I have been inundated with responses and comments about how our next generation teenagers are being shaped by technology. The extraordinary tools of cell phones, texting, and social networking truly are a powerful force that is shaping a totally new perspective on communication and even life for our young people.

If you are curious for more insights and research, I have come across a few articles that might help. Give them some prayerful consideration as to the relevance to your family.

A Conversation with Shane Hipps, Author of "Flickering Pixels". This is an excellent interview with Shane Hipps, the author of a powerful book on the impact of contemporary media on our lives. 

Millennials: This generation is diverse, educated and plugged-in.  An article by Ivey DeJesus on the general "plugged-in" nature of our kids.

 U.S. Students Suffering from Internet Addiction by Walden Siew. This is some interesting research pointed out to me by a "INFO for Families" reader. It seems that a teen's withdrawal symptoms from technology are similar to that of addictive drugs. 

Do You Need a Digital Sabbath? by Andrew Burden of Youth Specialties. He writes about taking regular time to disconnect from technology and how it actually has the potential to make you more effective in everything you do. 

TV's "Undercover Boss" as a Picture of the Incarnation?

Need a way to jump start a spiritual conversation with an hour of network TV viewing?

Blake Atwood writes at relevantmagazine.com that the new show "Undercover Boss" gives viewers an excellent illustration of Christ's incarnation. I like the show and I like what Atwood has to say. Read the article here. Then watch the show with your kids (and your newfound insights), and have a little discussion. 

Discuss how your lives would be different if your boss (Jesus) were walking through each day with you. Then remind your kids that He is, in fact, with them everywhere they go through the presence of the Holy Spirit. It might be interesting.

 

Kids Spend 7.5 Hours Per Day on "Entertainment Media"

Here's a great article passed on to me by Chris Trent, the (formidable) Middle School Minister at Johnson Ferry. It summarizes a Kaiser Family Foundation study on the implications of our kids living in a media-saturated culture. It's troubling stuff that caused this father to give thoughtful consideration of how much time we spend in front of a screen at my house.  Read on...

Kids Spend 7.5 Hours Per Day on 'Entertainment Media"

Henpecked Men in Superbowl Commercials

We live in a culture where many men experience some form of verbal emasculation on a daily basis. A few are married to cruel-hearted women who take some sick pleasure in keeping their men under their thumbs. But most guys probably have well-intentioned wives who feel that it is their responsibility to keep their husband's ego in check. (Ladies, this is a bad idea...nothing can destroy a man faster than when his wife puts him down.)

Apparently, the advertising wizards on Madison Avenue have tapped into this theme, trying to sell products by empathizing with men who experience this. And while many men can relate, I'm not sure it's healthy to make light of something so potentially destructive.  More thoughts found in an article by Jocelyn Noveck:

Henpecked Men Were a Fav Theme of Super Bowl Ads

Raising G Rated Kids in an R Rated World

How to help your kids stay in the world without being of the world.(Audio quality is so-so.)

Download Raising G Rated Kids in an R Rated World

Praying for Jon and Kate…and for the Rest of Us

When the movie Fireproof came out a year ago, I read a secular review that criticized the plot because it was too “trite.” The reviewer commented that it was silly to see a marriage falling apart simply because the husband failed to lovingly romance his wife and the wife didn’t show respect to her husband.  Sadly, this reviewer just doesn’t get it.

 

Most of the marriages that I witness on the brink of divorce are not plagued by huge infidelities or abuse. Instead, they are imploding because one or both parties have neglected simple things like love and respect.

 

Ephesians 5:33 clearly commands men to love their wives and women to respect their husbands. When you deny your spouse what he or she so desperately needs, it is very easy to move into a season of frustration, bitterness, and eventually, disconnect. Do this long enough and you forget why you got married in the first place. Divorce seems to offer a welcome relief from the pain you feel.